Adsurd

Advertising, invented by the Ancient Greeks 57 BC as propaganda to election campaigns, in 2010 has found a new use in the beautiful game. What was once the method for shooting Pukka Pies into stardom in front of terraces up and down the country has turned into a highly criticisable and notorious tactic to prevent one man and his long throws.

After a season of domineering any throw on situation, Rory Delap has come a-cropper of late, with away teams using advertising boards to block his arrogantly long run-up. It’s not the first time the long throw tactic has come into scrutiny, in the clash between Stoke and Birmingham at the Britannia over the festive period Liam Ridgewell was denied a towel by a ball-boy to prepare for the long throw - Obviously old Rory was treated conversely - so the officials decided no towels were to be used and like a playground farce the 4th official magisterially confiscated towels from all ball-boys.

That though isn’t as cynical as the tactics of both Burnley and West Ham though. At least West Ham made an effort and used new hoardings – Burnley just dug out some old ones from yesteryear. If you’re gunna dish out some top-drawer gamesmanship, you could at least roll in some cash on the way. Of course in both situations the struggling sides’ attempts were foiled with the javelin thrower reaching the box on numerous occasions, and even making his 10th throw-in assist of the season in the eerie North of Turf Moor.

West Ham’s attempts came after a six-week run of sour grapes and crap defending and were reported to be laid down by the ever-controversial co-owner David Sullivan who condemned the team as “shambolic” in his standardised pontifical tone. West Ham should of focused on their own throws though, as one of nothing more than 2.5 on the quality scale led to an interception and classy finish from Ricardo Fuller.

These successive events, albeit with little success do beg the question; what will teams do next to antidote Delap’s throw? Will they start handing out tubing for fans to attack the man, or hire a hitman to deal with him? Either way, only one thing remains certain…

His pertinacious tactics will long continue.