The Greatest Goal Ever Scored

For all the ‘foul-up’ DVD’s and catalogues of heroic saves, a conversation last month started a mission. I was posed with the question, on a crisp, wintry morning, “Mate, what is the best goal ever?” The initial response of ‘not a fapping clue’ didn’t help the cause. Yet, it is a relatively unanswered question to date and my search has found some of the reasons why. The fundamental problem is personal preference, a group of football fans could argue for hours over whether the technical brilliance of a dead-all strike outdoes a piledriven volley. It was these problems that I was first faced with in my initially impossible search, and the discussions early doors were swayed monumentally by loyalties to their individual allegiances. The first reckoning was affected as such, as the first response received was from an unashamedly biased Chelsea fan, seeing life through blue-tinted glasses, and recommending Zola’s strike vs. Norwich, other recommendations poured through and it was around the mark of the 20^th suggestion that I realised what I was looking for, a classic, a goal, that regardless of being scored last century or last weekend, would live for as long as the beautiful game does. The target – A timeless strike.

           

            The goal (p-unintentional, sorry I’ll stop now) was suitably acquired but now the method for hunting this target down was the next foreseeable step in my pilgrimage for potent perfection. A list of simply 10 goals would be harder to find than an iota of personality in Andy Murray, without abridging some golden oldies, the classics of yesteryear. Therefore, I had to devise a way of narrowing down the options as fairly as possible, and after some initial ideas which included de-crediting the whole idea by using only the aforegone decade or merely old Blighty, would be besides the point of the whole project.

            I came to the decision to find the best goals scored under separate categories; individual efforts, piledrivers, long range accumulators, dead-ball wizardry, and contextual gems. Jesus walked on water; I found the best goal in the confines of four corner flags, your move Jesus…

The Individual Masterpieces:

1^st Diego Maradonna 1986 World Cup vs. England.

The goal that this game will be remembered for will of course be the notorious ‘Hand of God’ yet that unfortunately overshadows this piece of individual brilliance, maybe the best goal the World Cup has ever seen. Picking up the ball in his own half Diego Armando Maradonna skipped expertly through two players and ran down the right flank. He continued to scythe through a further three defenders before reaching the 18 yard box. When there, as if the six beaten players wasn’t enough he deviated the football past the keeper and rolled the ball home. It’s nice to forget what the man is now, and remember that back in 1986, despite the heartbreak, the man was a genius.

2^nd Ronaldo 1996 La Liga vs. Atlético Bilbao – A powerful run and finish beating virtually the whole of the lacklustre defence stamped a young (and thin) Ronaldo’s name on everyone’s transfer list.

3^rd Dennis Bergkamp 2002 Premier League vs. Newcastle – Who doesn’t remember Bergkamp receiving the pass from Pires then flicking the ball over the on looking defender and scoring in almost one seamless motion – We don’t.

4^th Michael Owen 1998 World Cup vs. Argentina – Another flash of brilliance that sparked a truly incredible career as a young Owen latched onto a Beckham chip, used step-overs and pace to beat the defender before powerfully and commandingly striking that lump-o-leather home.

5^th Zlatan Ibrahimovic 2004 Eredivisie vs. NAC Breda – Often saying he had too much skill for the league showed here as he shimmied and swerved past helpless defenders flying in from all angles before sending the keeper the wrong way and slotting home.

The Potent Powerful Piledrivers:

1^st Roberto Carlos 1998 La Liga vs. Tenerife – He is a man that despite his occasional blips of foul plays, produced some spellbinding strikes throughout his career, and this strike may not necessarily be his best, and that is testament to the little genius. Following a scrappy midfield phase a diagonal ball was looped over towards the left by-line, and just when it seemed to be going out for a goal-kick Roberto Carlos da Silva Rocha struck a football in a way that would spark nostalgia and mean that he would live as the scorer of the ‘impossible goal’. FP salutes you.

2^nd Zinedine Zidane 2002 Champions League Final vs. Bayern Leverkusen – Possibly a contender for contextual goal, but this was a sublime strike. A deflection looped the ball high, and Zidane swivelled and struck left footed into the top corner.

3^rd Paulo DiCanio 1999 Premier League vs. Wimbledon – As a seemingly danger free ball was put into the box the cult hero of Upton Park jumped and superbly volleyed home, with no feet of the ground.

4^th Wayne Rooney 2005 Premier League vs. Newcastle United – As Ryan Giggs lost out to a header on the edge of the box, the Magpies thought the danger was clear, cue Wayne Rooney to score a sublime volley into the top left corner.

5^th Rivaldo 2001 La Liga vs. Valencia CF – In the 88^th minute of a game, half of you reading this would be cherishing the post match showers, but Rivaldo, love him or hate him, produced the best bicycle kick in history, simple.

The Long-Range Accumulators:

1^st Clarence Seedorf 1997 La Liga vs. Atlético Madrid – Most goals appearing in this category are strikingly similar, except this. The generic long range spectacle is the loopy goal from distance; Clarence Seedorf though kept it relatively low and powerful, very, very powerful. Picking the ball up some forty-five metres from goal, Seedorf rolled the ball a yard or so in front of his feet and as he fired the ball goalwards, everyone though he was crossing it, even the keeper though he was, everyone except Clarence Seedorf was take by surprise. The ball never went higher than the crossbar it was almost a piledriver but from too far a distance. Whatever it was, it was supreme accumulation.

2^nd Rivaldo 1998 La Liga vs. Atlético Madrid – Poor Atlético they’re here again, but conceded a goal they could do nothing about. A left footed strike from his own half was another something-from-nothing spectacular.

3^rd David Beckham 1996 Premier League vs. Wimbledon – Maybe it was a second Wimbledon appearance in the ‘scored against’ faction of our search that made their fans start their own team. Regardless this was Beckham at his best.

4th Paul Evans 2006 Coca-Cola League 2 vs. Preston North End – This goal is definitely one for those with lower-league loyalties, whilst the Preston fans were still celebrating their goal, Evans received the ball from the kick off, and only went and netted it!

5^th Maynor Figueroa 2009 Premier League vs. Stoke City – Quick free-kicks from nearer the goal that bulge the net are usually dispute but there were no such protests as the opportunistic Figueroa struck the free-kick from 56 yards found the target.

Dead-Ball Magicians:

1^st Roberto Carlos 1997 Tournoi de France vs. France – There is no question this is the best free-kick of all time, the only question remaining is how on earth did he do it? A ball boy 10 yards right of goal ducked as the 35 yard free-kick started on his line, but preeminent swerve from Carlos and a small amount of help from the inside of the post left Fabien Barthez open-mouthed (not for the first time) and helpless (not for the first time) although for once, the goal wasn’t his fault, or even the fault of whoever conceded the free-kick it was down the technical perfection of Roberto Carlos, and moreover, it will never be repeated.

2^nd Pele 1970 World Cup vs. Romania 1970 – The greatest player ever to grace a football pitch, unfortunately didn’t score the best goal ever, but this powerful strike curved round the wall and into the net before the keeper saw it.

3^rd Cristiano Ronaldo 2007 Friendly vs. Europa XI – It was the free-kick style that got all of you punks trying to hit the valve to achieve the crazy Ronaldo Rocket shape. Unprecedented and in my humble opinion, better than Juninho.

4^th Roberto Baggio 1989 Serie A vs. Lazio – Best known for his dead-ball exploits Roberto Baggio’s strike against Lazio wasn’t the classic free kick. A one-two with the man position for the lay-off and then the supreme swerve into the top corner lead to the divine strike.

5^th Ronaldinho 2006 La Liga vs. Racing Santander – Not to be confused with a more regulation free-kick ‘Little Ronaldo’ scored the season later, this audacious free-kick wasn’t technically beautifully or highly regarded, but it was very cheeky, as he slipped it under the wall.

The Contextual Motivators:

1^st Carlos Alberto 1970 World Cup Final vs. Italy – This was without a doubt the best team goal of all time, and what a time it came at! The move started in Brazil’s own half and the passing play that ensued surpassed eight Italy players and ended with a thundering finished. Striker Tosato found himself in the left back role and feints and passes followed before Pele found himself with the ball at his feet on the edge of the box after holding it up he layed it off to Alberto, the right-back who had rampaged forward, and finished the move with a vaporizing strike into the bottom corner.

2^nd Marco van Basten 1988 European Championship Final vs. USSR – A finish from the legend that was so technically perfect it left spectators gasping. The dipping volley hit by van Basten was defining in the eventual Netherlands win.

3^rd David Beckham 2001 World Cup Qualifers vs. Greece – The situation for England’s captain was simple, score and we book our tickets to Korea/Japan 2002. It took 92 minutes and 43 seconds for the goal, but it will live on as maybe his best ever.

4^th Ryan Giggs 1999 FA Cup Semi-Final Replay vs. Arsenal – The searching run from Giggsy and eventual goal amounted to in the end, one-third of Manchester United’s treble in 1999. If the run was spectacular the finish exceeded it as he found the top netting.

5^th Dennis Bergkamp 1998 World Cup Quarter Final vs. Argentina – A long ball was hoofed towards Bergkamp in the box in the dying embers of the quarter final he controlled majestically, nutmegged a defender, and hit it home, jaws everywhere dropped.

The Greatest Goal Ever Score… The Decision.

All five of the best in their individual categories were brilliant for their own reasons. The individual brilliance of Maradonna was contrasted by Brazil’s team goal. Roberto Carlos defied impossibility twice as he scored form zero angle and hit a banana swerve free kick, whilst Seedorf just smashed the hell out of it. But only one can be the greatest. Taking all of this into consideration it is with sublime pleasure that I announce my mission is over, until a timeless classic is struck again and that little Argentinean genius scything through the best part of a Three Lions team in the greatest goal of all time. How about putting your own country in the ‘conceded by’ column for neutral journalism?